A family is designed to
function as a single unit and therefore the home can be a wonderful place. It can be a
safe-haven and respite from the ever-present tumult in the world around us. It
should be a place where family members can lean on each other, share joys and
sorrows, and walk through life together.
But…
It is very difficult to do
these things when family members hardly even know one another, which is how so
many homes function today. The family is the foundational unit of society but
it is in crisis all over America. Spouses are at odds with one another if they are even
still married, parents and children are constantly fighting with one another,
and the family is in turmoil. There is very little unity.
When my husband and I were
dating and engaged, we felt many times like we were being pulled opposite
directions. He had his responsibilities and obligations for work, I had mine,
and the two didn’t always seem particularly compliant. My work required my
focus and energy, and his did the same. I longed for the day when I could set
my job aside and take up the work of supporting him and working WITH him, as a
team. Joining forces in a supportive network, rather than having each of us
flounder along on our own. We are thankful to have reached the point of being
able to do this.
When we look to the future,
it is also our desire that I can also be at home to invest in our children. To
teach them God’s Word at HOME, not only leave it up to the schools and
churches. To impart to them our core family values and a strong work ethic. To
know them personally, understand what makes them tick, and help them when they
are struggling. We do not want to be Mr.
and Mrs. Banks, from the classic Disney film, Mary Poppins. You remember them…
they are the couple who has breakfast with their children in the morning,
kisses them on the head, then heads off to everything else and leaving the
children under the care of the nanny and domestic staff. At night the parents
see the children for another hour then send them off to bed. Our society has
substituted schools and daycares for Nannies, but otherwise, we are often the
same.
There are other points
to consider about staying home. One is that it isn’t as expensive as people
think. There is lost income, but there are also lost expenses. Maintaining a
wardrobe for work can cost more than people expect and car expenses pile up
with mileage, gas, and maintenance that is needed more often. The convenience
of eating out is in high demand when both parents are on a busy schedule, but
with a little bit of practice, it is amazing the costs that an average wife can
save by shopping some grocery sales, watching for coupons, and cooking most
things at home. Many times the income change isn’t nearly as drastic as it is
perceived to be.
Another reason we chose for
me not to work full-time is that it gives me much greater flexibility in
ministry. The Professor and I are actively involved in our church and there are
people within that church that have needs. There are ministry opportunities
that are waiting for volunteers to help. By freeing up the weekly schedule, I
am in a better position to prepare for ministry events, as well as fill in when
people are unavailable for their regular ministries. The church is God’s
primary tool to organize believers to do His work, and having more flexibility
to be involved with that is wonderful because my identity is that I am a
Christian and my calling is to share the Gospel.
Again,
this is just a peek into our reasoning process and the points that we
considered when making this decision. Let me please repeat that this is not a
tirade against women in different circumstances. But I do believe that
homemaking, when done diligently and intentionally, is an important and
respectable skill that leads to many beneficial results within the home and
family.
Have you considered its possibilities for your family?
